To her cheshire smile I'll stand on file; she's all I ever wanted.

I need to stop worrying needlessly and just suck it up and do what I need to do.

I can't help being terrified every single time I think about going to a bunch of schools and talking to a bunch of professors. I don't feel prepared for it, and I'm scared of what will happen if they don't like me, or they don't like what they hear when I play. I guess they'll be polite. So far, everyone who has emailed me back seems relatively approachable, but I'm still pretty intimidated by... Well, by everything.

I need to just practice my butt off. Whenever I play, though, I sound so bad that I just can't bring myself to keep playing. I need to get over it.

Stupid low self-esteem...

END.